It's not like I thought it would be, you know, being alone. It's kinda spooky." I thought you were fourteen." It's still kinda spooky. Like, sleep with the light on, spooky."She laughed. "Imagine you're a girl. Then think about being scared, Matthew.For a moment, I imagined it too plainly."Good bye. Talk to you later, sweetheart." Bye, Mom."No bedtime, I just realized that. I could stay up all night and she wouldn't know. All night doing what, I wondered. Fuck.I tried Casey's knob and it turned. I swung open the door and looked inside. No alarms blared, no camera pointed its blunt nose at me. Neatly made bed covered with stuffed animals and a pink comforter. The top of her dresser inexplicably clean. No clothes on the floor and none draped over her red chair. Her laptop and color printer gone. Her iPad too, undoubtedly, and her flat screen TV. Dad would need to buy her another one before she came home at Thanksgiving.Casey's empty fucking bedroom. It made me depressed.I went to the. Then it was home to her apartment where she would make me shower again. I was never cleaner in my life.She always liked me to eat her pussy first. She had introduced me to eating pussy years before. Years before? My god, this had started back when I was only seven. A whole new flood of memories rushed into my mind. I was awash in memories. My mind was on overdrive tying to comprehend what this all meant. When you are 80, seven years is a small fraction of your life but when you are 14, seven years is one half of your life. At fourteen, I had been fucking my sister half of my life.“Em, Em, what’s wrong?” Suddenly I realized I had gone off into my memories. Mary was bringing me back to the present. Letterman was still on TV. My sister was shaking my shoulder. I looked into her eyes and saw genuine concern. I smiled and said, “Just remembering things I haven’t thought of for many years.”“I remember every day…every day now and every day then,” she said. She moved.
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